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On September 16, 2024, music mogul and rapper Sean “Diddy” Combs was arrested in Manhattan following accusations of physical and sexual abuse. The charges included allegations of running a sex trafficking operation since 2008 and racketeering. By the end of the month, the accusations expanded to include rape, kidnapping, and prostitution. Among the allegations, was that one of Combs’ victims was a 9-year-old boy auditioning for Bad Boy Records, his record label.

Despite the gravity of these accusations—spanning decades and involving over 100 potential victims—the public response has highlighted a troubling trend, says Jeffrey Berrios for Santa Monica College’s The Corsair: society’s persistent inability to take male victims of sexual abuse seriously.

A Pattern of Dismissal

When news of the allegations broke, the internet was flooded with reactions ranging from shock to disbelief. While some expressed outrage at Combs’ actions, others made inappropriate jokes, particularly focusing on the alleged involvement of male victims. Social media platforms quickly became rife with homophobic remarks and dismissive humor. One X (formerly Twitter) user criticized this behavior, stating, “The man was a monster and abuser of industrial magnitude… Just feels wrong to joke.” Another user on TikTok highlighted the pervasive disregard for male sexual abuse survivors, noting, “The way many men and women responded to the Diddy allegations with jokes and homophobia proves that our society does not care about men sexual assault victims.”

This lack of empathy mirrors past instances where male victims of abuse have faced ridicule or disbelief. High-profile cases, such as Wade Robson and James Safechuck’s allegations against Michael Jackson, were met with jokes and skepticism. Similarly, in the 1996 case of Mary Kay Letourneau, who groomed and assaulted her 12-year-old student, comedian Bill Maher trivialized the situation by questioning whether a woman could “rape” a man.

Even earlier, in 1992, three former WWE employees—Tom Hankins, Murray Hodgson, and Barry Orton—spoke out about sexual abuse they endured, only to be met with laughter during their appearance on the Phil Donahue Show. These instances illustrate the enduring cultural bias that makes it difficult for male victims to come forward and be taken seriously, Berrios argues.

Toxic Masculinity and Its Role

The response to the Diddy allegations sheds light on a deeper issue: the pervasive influence of toxic masculinity. In a male-dominated industry like hip-hop, where masculinity is often defined by power and dominance, acknowledging male victimization disrupts ingrained perceptions. When someone like Combs—idolized as a macho mogul—is accused of abusing men and boys, the cognitive dissonance leads some to process the information with dismissive humor or outright denial.

This reaction is not just harmful but indicative of a societal failure to provide space for male survivors to be heard. Toxic masculinity fosters an environment where vulnerability is seen as weakness, making it difficult for men and boys to seek support or justice without facing stigma.

Why Jokes Are Harmful

The dismissive jokes surrounding the Diddy allegations do more than trivialize the trauma of his alleged victims—they also contribute to a culture of silence. Victims often fear ridicule or disbelief, and public reactions like these can deter others from coming forward. As one social media user pointed out, the insensitivity of the jokes demonstrates why it took decades for accusations against Combs to surface.

The normalization of humor as a coping mechanism for uncomfortable truths perpetuates the idea that abuse against males is less severe or less valid than abuse against females. This attitude hinders progress in addressing abuse across all genders.

Moving Forward

As society continues to grapple with the allegations against Sean Combs, it is imperative to shift the narrative from jokes and disbelief to empathy and advocacy. Male victims of sexual abuse face unique barriers, including societal stigma and a lack of understanding about their experiences. By challenging toxic masculinity and fostering a culture that supports all survivors, we can create an environment where victims feel safe to come forward.

The Diddy case is a reminder of how far we have to go in addressing sexual abuse against males, says Berrios. Until society takes these issues seriously and prioritizes victim advocacy over misplaced humor, progress will remain out of reach.